Table for one.

egberts:

i love cats so much every time i see a cat anywhere i try to get it to come to me and i point out every cat i see while i’m in a car and i talk about my cat all the time and think about other people cats i love cats

(via phanic-atthe-disco)

breakingbag:

yes hello this is your pilot speaking and by pilot i mean i read a wikihow on flying a plane once so i guess ill just have to WING it haha just a little pilot humor okie dokie nothing to worry about folks im sure i can figure this out

(via pride)

porch:

best insult ever

grrrlfever:

my life became 600% better when i started acting like a self obsessed piece of shit like 10/10 would recommend

even if u don’t actually genuinely love yourself its fuckin fun to act like you think you’re the human embodiment of perfection go on try it life’s too short to not fall in love with yourself

(Source: lesbolution, via count-o-laugh)

amortizing:

third wheeling two girls who are best friends is so much worse than third wheeling a couple

(via morninqs)

rebageld:

unhealthy you say? the apple i ate when i was 7 years old begs to differ 

(Source: taggedbooty, via asian)

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